Thursday, June 24, 2010

In a Crazy World

This is crazy. I feel like I'm losing myself.

I'm so constantly unhappy and sad. What happened to the girl people used to ask "Why are you always smiling?" I seem to constantly be in a black hole of unhappiness and emotional pain. This is utterly crazy.

This is not supposed to be a "Nobody understands me and my problems" talk or a "you don't know how hard my life is" whine. None of that crap. We've heard it all before. We (teenagers/youths) like to think we have the most problems in the world. I'm confused. I wish you could understand. This is soooooooo crazy.

I wish I could go back in time to the brief 3 months I was in Ajayi Crowther University where I felt almost constant happiness and joy. Always smiling, bubbly personality, everything that was/is (I don't even know anymore) me. AWESOME friends that truly cared and showed love. The best three months of my life when I constantly felt loved and happy and me. Now I'm in this deep black hole that is driving me crazy.

Can you hear me screaming???? THIS IS NOT ME!!!!!!! Ohmigosh! I don't even understand this craziness anymore.

I'm going to bed soon. My head is aching from this madness and utter craziness.

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